Thin Blue Line
by Stephensmat
Summary: Alexis liked Kate. But if her dad stayed with her, he was going to get himself killed. And she spent days trying to work up the nerve to say so. Spoilers up to Season 3 finale.


**THIN BLUE LINE**

* * *

It wasn't that she didn't _want_ to go. She wanted to go to Stanford, get a fantastic education... And Ash. She wanted to be with Ashley. She had vowed never to get her brain messed up by a boy. But there was Ash, turning her head this way and that and making her feel all wonderful and confused.

She could see her father's problem.

But her father had been divorced multiple times. She knew better than to think love could conquer all.

It wasn't that she didn't want to go to Stanford... but there was a reason why her father wasn't talking her out of it. There were universities in... or at least a lot _closer_ to New York. A year ago, her father was offering to put money down on any of them. Five years ago it was all they talked about. But now, shocked though he was... he didn't say anything. Why wasn't he saying anything? Why wasn't he talking her out of it?

_Because if you leave the city for the next four years... He'll have a better chance with her. For the first time… he doesn't mind if you leave._

She pushed that thought away. Alexis had never been jealous of her father's girlfriends. Or even his wives. Kate was neither.

The groupies and the blondes that had come home with him over the years would come out for breakfast and find a smiling teenager at the breakfast table, and more often than not they would make a quick exit and that would be that.

It was always him and her against the world. Richard and Alexis: Team Castle. With Martha as an alternate when things got tough.

But this was different. Kate was smart, and tough, and kind. Of all the women swarming around her father, this one was the only one she really looked up to. And Alexis liked her.

She overheard his father talking to grandma. Talking about him and Kate. Idly, Alexis wondered when she stopped being Detective Beckett and became 'Kate'.

"The gossip pages are all over you again." Martha was saying, warm and amused. "They've come up with the shipper term for you two. Castle and Beckett becomes 'Caskett'. I think someone on the Internet said it first."

"On my website. CastleHo1192 got it first. Let me tell you mother, it is truly exciting to be present at the birth of a new buzzword."

Alexis felt a thrill of horror go through her at the word 'Caskett' alone. But her father was laughing.

"Kind of ghoulish though, isn't it?" Martha was laughing too. "Caskett."

He laughed. "Appropriate, since we're homicide detectives."

It got worse. He said 'since we're homicide detectives'. He had officially forgotten that he was never a cop.

Kate was smart, and tough, and kind. And Alexis liked her. That made this difficult. Because this strong, smart, challenging, compassionate, driven, wonderful woman was going to get her father killed.

She went up to the mirror, squared her shoulders, and rehearsed it again. "Dad. I don't want you to work with the police any more." She said firmly. "She's obsessed with this case, and she's never going to stop. Not for you. We know that now. Someone killed her mother, and is still killing people to cover it up. She won't let it go, and I understand why, but she wasn't your mother, and you don't have a badge. She's good for you, but she's always going to choose the job over you, and the job is going to get you killed."

She nodded. Taking a breath, she imagined what he'd say to that and she shook her head. _No. Not good enough._

"Dad…" She tried again. "Remember when mom ran out on us, and you promised you'd always be there for me? I remember you said that we'd always be a Team. You said that I'd always be the most important person in your life. Dad… I feel like an icy cold hand closes around my gut every time I see that bullet-proof vest in your closet. Please dad, please don't do this any more. If you want to be with Detective Beckett, all you have to do is ask her. If she says no after this long, then staying with her at the precinct won't change her mind by this point. If it's ever going to happen, it'll happen without all the dead bodies and chalk outlines."

She looked at her face in the mirror. _Better_.

The door opened, and closed. She turned on her heel, ready to march in there and...

Crying. She could hear crying.

Forgetting it all at once, she went to her bedroom door and looked out to the living room, where she saw her dad gently leading Kate Beckett to the nearest couch. She looked miserable. She had tears running down her face.

_Oh god._ Alexis thought to herself. _It happened. I don't know what but it happened._

"Nobody can know what he did Castle." Kate was almost blubbering. "Nobody!"

"I promise." Her father said immediately.

"He was a hero. Not a villain. Call Ryan and Esposito; they're the only other ones that know. We don't make this about what he did."

It got worse. Alexis cowered in her room, listening down the stairs. Her father wasn't just observing and helping out. He was keeping their secrets, telling their lies.

It was suddenly so clear. Her father was _never_ going to be smart about this. He was too much part of their world now. Too much in love with Kate. His brain switched off when the women he cared about were involved. The alimony checks were proof of that.

Beckett had sent him away twice now, and he had stayed away when she told him to.

And once again, Alexis went to the mirror, squared her shoulders, and started to rehearse. "Detective Beckett... I want you to send my father away. You never should have let it go on. Not for this long. If you want to be with him, then do so, but stop letting him ride along out to crime-scenes and arrests. How many times has my father been shot at because of you? You are very good for him. He's… he's become such a grown-up with you. But before you get him killed, or break his heart, or both…"

_No, that's not fair. _She told herself._ Actually… why not?_

"Detective, you worked your whole life to become a cop. How many nights will your father lie awake waiting for the call? You got the call one night; telling you that your mother was dead. I don't want to go through that. I don't _ever_ want to get the call. Every time my cell goes off when I'm not expecting it, every time I get called to see a teacher or the Principal, the first thought to go through my mind is maybe… I don't want to be a cop's daughter."

Alexis worked herself up to it, but she knew that she couldn't do this tonight.

There was a knock on her door.

"Come in."

The door opened. "Hi."

She turned. "Hey dad. What's going on?"

He came forward and hugged her warmly like he was never going to let her go. This must have been worse than she thought.

After a long time he broke the hug. "Sweetie, something terrible has happened."

* * *

"Alexis?" Martha called. "Alexis?"

There was a knock coming from the closet. Martha turned and opened the door. Alexis was sitting in her closet, hugging her knees. The poor girl looked awful.

Martha was stunned. "Alexis, sweetie. The closet? You stopped hiding in the closet when you were six years old."

"I stopped when I was seven. I _started_ when I was six; after the divorce." Alexis croaked.

Martha blinked. She never made that connection. "Sweetie, there was a time I would have come in there and sat next to you. Take pity on an old woman's knees and let's sit on the bed; okay?"

Smiling a little, Alexis wiped the tears aside and stood up. Her grandmother sat next to her, hugging her sideways. "Okay. Tell me everything."

"Captain Montgomery is dead."

"I heard." Martha said heavily. "But you barely knew him, why is it making you seek closet therapy…"

"Because he had a desk job. He hadn't taken cases in years, and now he's dead, and my father was right in the middle of it, because _That Woman_ was obsessed with this case."

Martha reacted to the scorn. "I worry about him too sweetie. But, when did Kate Beckett become 'That Woman' to you?"

"Roughly about the time she went rogue and took off for LA… and dad left us a note saying that he'd gone with her." Alexis sniffed. "I remember, after mom walked out on me and dad; I hid in the closet a lot. Dad was worried about me… He took me to Paris. Remember?"

"I remember."

"I told him… that he must have loved mom a lot if they had me; if they got married. I was scared that he might go after her; try to win her back. And if he did, then he might go running after her and forget about me."

Martha hugged her tighter. "Oh, sweetheart…"

"I know it'd never happen, but I was six years old and mom ran away from home." Alexis blubbered a little. "I… told dad this, and the first thing he did was call a travel agent. We were in Paris by the end of the weekend. And he took me all around the sights, and we went…" She sniffed. "He took me to such... _beautiful_ places. I remember the trees. We were kicking the leaves, and the whole city seemed to be golden and orange, and… I remember there was this Café and he taught me about coffee. He bought me Mocha. First one I ever had. And there were boat rides on the Seine, and listening to the bells of Notre Dame, and making jokes about the nudes at the Louvre…"

Martha smiled a little, as Alexis wiped some tears away.

Alexis sniffed. "After the trip, we were on the plane back. First class. The…" Alexis sniffed. "He gave me the window seat, and we could see the whole city laid out, and all lit up at night… And I remember I had this huge smile on my face. It was so... magical. And then dad leaned in, and he said: Do you know why I took you to Paris?"

Martha smiled. She hadn't heard any of this before. "What did you say?"

"I said it must have been because I was feeling sad about mom."

"And what did he say?"

Alexis smiled at the memory. "He said… He said that it was because I was a beautiful wonderful girl, and lots of men would want to take me to Paris when I grew up. He said that my first time in Paris should be with someone who would love me more than anybody else in the world, no matter what. He told me that we were a Team, and we always would be. He said that the whole world couldn't break that. Through a parade of women, three or four criminal trials, fourteen bestseller books, a million functions, cocktail parties, and school camps, and BFF's… we were always that Team."

Martha smiled. "That's a wonderful story."

Alexis broke down crying again."Before he met the Detective, he would have dedicated himself to talking me out of going to Stanford. He would have hired skywriters, and brass bands, and whatever it took to make me go to a closer school _here_. But now he's out searching for rogue cops who kill people. He's going to kill himself and he doesn't care!"

Martha hugged her tighter. "Listen to me, your father loves you. He loves you so much it's not funny. There is no way he would leave you behind."

"I know. But He's Not A Cop!" Alexis whined. "He's not a cop, and this is not his responsibility. It's _not right_ that he gets so deep into something so dangerous."

"I know." Martha said regretfully. "I told him that myself a few times this week."

"What did he say?"

"You know your father. He talks all the time without saying anything. But Alexis… This hasn't been about writing a book for a long time now. You know that."

"I do." Alexis said softly.

"Have you spoken to Ash about this?"

"And say what? I'm angry my father isn't trying to get me to dump him before college?"

"Fair point." Martha sighed. "Alexis, there isn't anyone left in the world who doesn't know that when they called them 'New York's Finest', they knew what they were talking about. All these things you're feeling, they all have family and loved ones who feel it every minute of every day."

"Like Captain Montgomery's family?"

"Just like them."

"Their father died this week. They worry like this all the time, and he even had a desk job. He still gets killed. My father has a custom bullet proof vest made for himself because he knew he'd need one! How am I supposed to be okay with that?"

Martha didn't have an answer to that.

Alexis sniffed. "You know what the worst part is?"

"What's that?"

"Detective Beckett is a great person. I like her. I... look up to her. She doesn't deserve… Crying in the closet."

"I like her too." Martha said quietly, her tone gentle. "Sweetie… it might be time for you to start calling her 'Kate'."

Alexis fell back on her bed miserably. "'Just book research' he said. Just to look around and see what makes her tick for his next series of books."

"To be fair, the Nikki Heat books are his biggest sellers."

"All two of them." Alexis shot back. "He used to put out three or four books a year. He doesn't care about the books. He doesn't care about anything anymore."

"Bite your tongue!" Martha said sharply. "There's nothing he wouldn't do for you!"

Alexis sat up. "Grandma, when he told us to get out of New York because an 'event' might happen? Even one year ago, he would have come with us!"

Martha sighed. "I know." She looked old for a moment. "Have you told your father how you feel about any of this?"

"Oh of course not!" Alexis complained. "What would that do? When he was back with Gina? He was mad as all heck because she was being _nice_ to me. From Beckett he gets parenting advice. If he agreed to leave the Precinct right now and never walk back in, it wouldn't get her out of his life."

Martha looked at her seriously a moment. "Do you _want_ her out of his life? You remember what he was like those summers he was away from the Precinct. Do you just want her gone?"

Alexis looked down. "No. Not really. She's… good. She's good for him, she's good for us, and she's just an honestly good person. But if they managed to make it work, _without_ the cases and death and the dead bodies… They'd be happy, but she'd still be a cop. And then it'd be this all over again; with all of us waiting for the day she gets killed. If he walks away from the Precinct because I told him to; and then something happens to her; he'd never forgive himself if he wasn't there."

"So where does that leave us?" Martha asked sincerely. "It doesn't help if he stays with them, it doesn't get easier if he leaves. Where do we go from here?"

Alexis sighed. "Closet?"

"Old woman's knees. Kitchen. I'll get the ice-cream."

* * *

The next time she saw Beckett, was when she came back the day of the funeral. Alexis had been working up the nerve for two days, rehearsing her little speech the whole time. The second she saw the Detective in that uniform she lost her nerve.

"Castle. You ready to go?"

"Yeah. Let me get my jacket. Alexis, you too, it's a chilly morning."

Beckett blinked in shock. "Oh. I hadn't thought…"

Castle seemed surprised. "Is there a problem?"

"Do... should I not come?" Alexis asked softly. "I don't want to step on any toes..."

Kate nodded and swallowed thickly. "There's a memorial at the Station later if you want to pay respects. But for the burial... just police and relatives. When a cop is honored and laid to rest... It stays in the family."

"They are family." Her father said firmly.

Beckett looked at him for a moment, and nodded finally.

Alexis barely heard them. She pulled her jacket on mechanically, and Martha led her by hand down to the car.

Alexis was still reeling. _'It stays in the family.'_ Kate hadn't thought to invite her, because this was a place where well-wishers and everyday acquaintances weren't welcome. But Kate was certain that her father was going because it 'stayed in the family'. A family of people where getting shot dead was a very real possibility.

* * *

Sitting at the funeral next to her grandmother, she saw her father carrying the coffin. He was a pallbearer. Nothing but uniforms across the whole graveyard, and her father was one of the pallbearers.

Beckett was giving the eulogy. In full dress uniform. The fact that she was a police officer was never clearer. Alexis worst nightmare was never more vivid. All the Police Officers that loved and respected Montgomery, and he was dead. He was doing a desk job, no longer out on cases, he was off the Thin Blue Line and he was dead.

Team Castle weren't the only civilians there. Alexis could see family members. She could see Montgomery's daughters, not much younger than she was. They looked sick. Every cop, every civilian, every member of the family was giving them sympathetic looks. It was a look that held promise of the common unspoken fear. Every single person here was on the line.

Jenny was there. Her father had pointed the pretty blonde girl-next-door out to her. She looked shell-shocked. Alexis felt for her. She was engaged to a cop; and it was her first police funeral. It wouldn't be the last. Jenny kept looking at Ryan. Just as Alexis kept looking at her father.

And then something happened.

"KATE!" Her father yelled explosively.

Alexis felt the cold hand wrap around her stomach again. The now familiar sound of blood thundering through her ears. "-what is it? What's happening?"

_**BANG**_!

Alexis felt her eyes bulge. Her father was trying to take the bullet!

Alexis hunched low into her chair instantly, trying to duck while sitting down. She saw Kate get folded in half at the stomach, and a bright red splash of blood; just as her father tackled the woman down.

_Good. _The thought went through her mind swiftly._** No**! That's horrible! _

_If she dies your father will be out of danger. _A traitorous little thought came to her.

_If she dies, a good person will be gone forever and dad will be heartbroken. _She told herself firmly.

Two dozen police officers tackled her, covering her body and whisking her away. Their training demanded it: Protect the civilians.

"Alexis!" Martha was shouting. "Was he hit? Was your father hit?"

"I don't know!" Alexis screamed back into somebody's shoulder. She couldn't see anything.

"GET AN AMBULANCE!" Ryan was screaming.

"I'M A DOCTOR! LET ME THROUGH!" Lanie was screaming.

"WHERE'S THE SHOOTER?"

"WHO'S BEEN HIT? WHO'S BEEN HIT? WHO'S BEEN HIT?"

Alexis squeezed her eyes shut. The nightmare was coming true. Every sleepless night she'd had for three years was happening.

_Who **is** this woman that my father is so willing to jump in front of the bullet? Is he really so in love with her that he'd rather leave me as an orphan than see her get knocked down? Don't I matter to him any more?_

* * *

Esposito was good about it, putting her into the car they came in. Alexis was scanning every face she saw. Nothing but uniforms in every direction. Javier stayed with her.

"Where is he?" Alexis demanded hollowly. "Where's dad?"

"On the way to the hospital." He said darkly. A tone that spoke of swift brutal vengeance. "Castle went in the ambulance."

Alexis soft blue eyes turned to ice. "As a patient, or a passenger?"

Esposito's eyes cooled; realising the problem. "Hey Castle Jr, don't stress. Your old man is indestructible."

Alexis recognised the gesture, and appreciated it not at all. "No." She whispered. "He's not. Nobody is."

"Either way it doesn't matter." Martha was marching, storming towards the car, keys out. "I'm going down to the hospital. I don't know what happened, but your father is going to need as many friendly faces as he can get."

The worry and the guilt were warring for first place in Alexis mind. "I'm coming too." She heard her voice say.

"Javier!"

Esposito turned and saw Ryan running up. "I didn't get a visual on the shooter either."

"He shot her! He shot Beckett!" Ryan roared.

"I know. I know." Esposito growled. The two of them exchanged a single nod, and Alexis felt a chill. Whoever the shooter was, he'd never make it to trial. She didn't know them well, but she knew they were as loyal to Kate as a pack of guard dogs.

And it hadn't helped. This woman had at least three men willing to take the bullet for her, two of them professional police officers, the third her father; and she _still_ got shot.

_Decision made._ She told herself as the engine started. _If she lives, you tell dad everything, and you give him the choice. If she dies, he'll never go back there. He can try and get closer to the cop, or he can stay close with his daughter. He can't have it both ways. Not like this. _

_He can be Team Castle, or Team Caskett._

* * *

_**AN**: Just a little look at how Alexis is doing this whole time.  
_

_If you would, there is this wonderful little review button below. As Castle would be the first to tell you, reviews are like oxygen.  
_


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